Sometimes the tie between an urban neighborhood and a suburban community is so strong that movement between them seems entirely natural.

Sometimes Teaneck seems like the Upper West Side, but with parking space and lawns.

So when 31 Upper West Siders from Kehillat Hadar came to add their spirit to the davening at the parallel minyan at Temple Beth Sholom last Shabbat, it was a celebration for both sides.

Beth Sholom, a shul that counts a throng of Jewish Theological Seminary faculty members as congregants, is one of the many communities that either maintain strong relationships or have moved wholesale across the river. So when the parallel minyan there, which began in the mid-1980s as an egalitarian service when such services were rare in Bergen County, felt in need of revitalization, it seemed logical for its leaders to reach across the Hudson to Hadar, a new egalitarian-halachic Upper West Side minyan.

The idea first came from Rabbi Shelly Kniaz of Teaneck. On Shavuot she went to Camp Ramah in the Berkshires with her husband, Rabbi Eliezer Diamond, who was scholar-in-residence at Hadar's annual retreat. "I was blown away by Hadar's music, by the kavannah, by the spiritual quality of their davening," Kniaz said. "They are so serious and committed - and joyous, at the same time. I thought that they would be an incredible resource for a congregation."

The idea was taken up by Harvey Rosen, who's part of the Beth Sholom parallel minyan's steering committee. The main service at Beth Sholom has long been egalitarian; the minyan is different from the main service in that it's smaller and lay-led; there is more singing and a long Torah discussion instead of a sermon. But "over the last year or two we've been re-evaluating what the minyan is, and what we want from it," Rosen said. "We're trying to bring in new melodies and new people."

Of the 31 Hadar visitors, about half had relatives in town with whom they could stay; the other half were housed by the Beth Sholom parallel minyan community. On Friday night, Hadar taught the Teaneck group some new melodies, and on Shabbat morning everyone sang them together. Hadar's scholar-in-residence, Rabbi Shai Held, gave the dvar Torah. The weekend "was terrific," said Rosen. "It was a great group; the melodies were fabulous; we all shared great ruach," spirit. "It was a very memorable Shabbat."

	At Hadar's Shavuot retreat, Elie Kaunfer talks to Debbi Bohnen as her son, Yair Wall, flirts with the camera.

Debbi Bohnen and Adam Wall acted as living bridges between the two groups; the pair, who are married and the parents of 1 1/2-year-old Yair Wall, moved from the Upper West Side to Teaneck six months ago. Now members of Beth Sholom, they are former gabbaim at Hadar.

Bohnen found the weekend fun, as she had expected; "it's fun having our friends stay with us," she said. Beyond that, she found it useful, and she thought that it could be helpful for her city friends as well. She and Wall were the first to have a child and move out, and she knows that soon Manhattan's housing market will force others to follow their lead. "It's a challenge for people who are committed to the things Hadar is about - egalitarian davening and a commitment to halacha - to find a community that they feel comfortable in and enjoy once they leave the city. That's part of what brought us to Teaneck.

"I know that this Shabbat was not planned as real-estate Shabbat, but it might end up being that," she added. "That would be a bonus for Beth Sholom - and it certainly would be a bonus for me."

Elie Kaunfer, a third-year rabbinical student at JTS, is one of Hadar's gabbaim. "The weekend went really well; the anecdotal feedback was very positive," he said. "It was a nice meshing of the two communities. Through teaching the melodies, and by the presence of a bunch of daveners, we were able to add to the experience at the minyan. And the Teaneck community modeled true Jewish hospitality; they're so warm, and they housed us and they fed us. We felt very welcome and very appreciated."

Kaunfer has connections to Teaneck. His aunt, Dr. Anne Lapidus Lerner, is married to Rabbi Stephen Lerner of the township's Cong. Kanfei Shahar. He's keenly aware of how Hadar members, most of whom are in their 20s and 30s, will have to decide what they want to do as their needs change. "That's the question - what people will do when they have children," he said. "Whether they'll go to the suburbs or another city, that's all up in the air."

He thinks that the more Hadar members see, and the more they share, the more they will know. "We'll be doing this more," he said. "We got to have some wonderful interactions, and it was energizing for the community. Sometimes there is an assumption that people at Hadar only want to hang out with other people their age, but it was exciting to see families, to see babies and teenagers and older people. That's what Teaneck was able to model for us; it was exciting to be able to engage with that community."